Wednesday, May 3

Sharpest and Funniest Comeback Retort I have Heard in a Long Time ...

I usually don't post jokes here, but this was so funny ...

If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman.

He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial. ?The lawyer was

trying to undermine the policeman's credibility....

Q: "Officer -- did you see my client fleeing the scene?"

A: "No sir. ?But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away."

Q: "Officer -- who provided this description?"

A: "The officer who responded to the scene."

Q: "A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. ?Do you trust your fellow officers?"

A: "Yes, sir. ?With my life."

Q: "With your life? ?Let me ask you this then officer. ?Do you have a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?"

A: "Yes sir, we do!"

Q: "And do you have a locker in the room?"

A: "Yes sir, I do."

Q: "And do you have a lock on your locker?"

A: "Yes sir."

Q: "Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with these same officers?"

A: "You see, sir -- we share the building with the court complex, and SOMETIMES LAWYERS HAVE BEEN KNOWN TO WALK THROUGH THAT ROOM!"

2 comments:

The Raving Norseman said...

Heh. That, of course, reminds me of the classic joke:

A defending attorney was cross examining a coroner. The attorney asked "Before you signed the death certificate had you taken the man's pulse?"
The coroner said, "No."
The attorney then asked, "Did you listen for a heart beat?"
"No."
"Did you check for breathing?"
"No."
"So when you signed the death certificate you had not taken any steps to make sure the man was dead, had you?"
The coroner, now tired of the brow beating said, "Well, let me put it this way. The man's brain was sitting in a jar on my desk, but for all I know he could be out there practicing law somewhere."

Dona said...

I really hope that GeeGuy doesn't think you're picking on him:)